A Journey Beyond “Disability,” Inspired By Love

Mia and Stacey blog about their big move, and how they'll help each other make it.

By Hatty Lee Oct 26, 2010

Thanks to ColorLines reader Verónica for sending in today’s Celebrate Love submission.

Meet Mia and Stacey–two disabled, queer, Korean American women are making a big move from the South to the Bay Area. It’s not just distance that makes the journey large. The Bay is not the most affordable, nor always the most accessible area for two disabled women. But together, they believe, they’re stronger than apart. Their new home, they know, will only thrive if they take care of each other. And they’ve created a Tumblr blog called To The Other Side of Dreaming where they write letters to each other about that shared responsibility. Right now, Stacey lives with her family in North Carolina and Mia lives in Atlanta. Here are a couple of short excerpts from their letters to each other:

Dear Stacey, The other night I dreamt about a lion. I woke up remembering the way its mane looked in the night and how beautiful it was as it glided past me. I looked it up and dreaming about lions can mean different things, and I think in my dream it was signaling courage. 

It takes courage to move, to change one’s life, I know it is scary. It takes courage to live. It takes courage to want for ourselves what we would want for our loved ones.  Sometimes it is easier to fight for others, than to fight for ourselves. Sometimes it is easier to dream than to jump.  Sometimes it takes all the courage one has to just maintain where you are.

love, mia

dear mia,  we have the audacity (or irresponsibility?) to say publicly that we are choosing to create a home where our access depends on each other. we will not be able to just walk out on another if we get mad. you will need the money i bring home. i will need your physical help and connections to community. we are letting ourselves need each other in a world where disabled people experience the brunt of manipulation, abuse, isolation, violence, shaming, guilt, blame and control on a daily basis because they need another person to meet their access needs.

california or bust, right?

i believe in the possibility of our move. I believe in community and our creative crip powers to make things work.  I am dreaming of us and home, but damn, how did we even get to this place of thinking this might be possible? 

stacey

Both are powerful and amazing women fighting everyday for disability justice, racial justice and gender justice. Their unconditional support for each other in dealing with these struggles is inspiring. One last line from Stacey to Mia:

i think that’s why you mean so much to me: we can wade together. we dream a crip qtpoc community that includes us. we will do this work together with other korean/API community.

We’re ending the day as often as possible by celebrating love. We welcome your ideas for posts. Send suggestions to [email protected], and be sure to put Celebrate Love in the subject line. You can send links to videos, graphics, photos, quotes, whatever. Or just chime in to the comments below and we’ll find you. Be sure to let us know you’ve got the rights to share any media you send.