Coming Out to My Dad, on NPR

Jun 23, 2011

Well, not really. I came out as gay to my dad many years ago, through a letter exchange that has stayed with me ever since. But NPR’s "Tell Me More" is airing a lovely series this week in which regular guests of the show share their coming out stories, and I contributed mine yesterday.

June is Gay Pride month, and this Sunday is Pride here in New York City. There’s a good chance that we’ll mark the occasion with the passage of a bill recognizing same-sex marriages in state law. When there’s a vote, I’ll write more about that always contentious discussion; it stirs just as many debates inside LGBT politics as it does elsewhere. And we’re working on our own package of Colorlines’ Pride-timed content. But for now, I just want to share my NPR commentary. I’ll give away the punchline:

A popular rejoinder to homophobes today is to assert that being gay is not a choice — that we are born this way, as Lady Gaga tells us. I disagree.

The most important part about being gay is precisely the part we choose — to stand up and own who we are, proudly.

Again, my father put it best: "I have no knowledge or understanding of what being gay is about," he wrote, "but I do believe the best life is the honest life."

Read it or give it a listen on NPR.org.